Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Pro Bowl Rosters Were Announced Today


Pro Bowlers were announced today.  As usual, I have some concerns.

Issue #1

How in the blue hell did the 5-10 Dallas Cowboys get more Pro Bowlers than the New Orleans Saints and the Chicago Bears?  How do they get more than the NY Giants or the Washington Redskins when both of those teams finished ahead of them in their division?  And what about the Green Bay Packers and the Philadelphia Eagles?  They're going to finish 10-6, make the playoffs, and destroyed the Cowboys when they played head-to-head, and they got the same number of Pro-Bowlers as the once 1-8 Dallas Cowboys.  I can accept Jason Witten and DeMarcus Ware.  I could have done without the rest.

I know how this shit keeps happening.  Its the same reason that the AL All Star team always includes the whole Yankees and Red Sox starting lineups - the leagues are stupid and they allow the fans to vote.  And I can't even complain too much about the NFL.  At least in the NFL the fans' vote only counts for 1/3 of the total ballot.  In baseball, they're stupid enough to give the fans total control over a decision that affects home field advantage in their championship.

Why not just let the sportswriters decide?  Or maybe the coaches?  Or here's an interesting idea: how 'bout the players?  You know, the people who go out there and play every Sunday.  The guys who actually have an idea of what its like to try to match up with the other guys on the field.  I bet Andre Johnson can give you a much better idea of whether or not Cortland Finnegan is a good defensive back than Memphis_Dan6969@yahoo.com can. 

Side Note: Is there any better way to tell the world that you're an enormous pervert than by putting '69' in your email address or screen name?  Whenever I encounter such a person, I make a mental note to make sure he or she is never left alone with children.  I mean, what better way to establish yourself as a creep than by putting a sexual reference in something as superfluous as a username?  My advice, just don't use those digits under any circumstances.  I don't care if you were born in 1969.  I don't care if the digits are preceded by 'fanofthemoonlanding'.  Its just not a good idea.  You don't need the bad vibes that come from being lumped in with teenagers and sexual deviants.


Issue #2

Aaron Rodgers got robbed!  He missed 3 games and still put up more yards than Matt Ryan.  His quarterback rating was 10 points higher than Ryan's, he averaged 2 more yards per catch, and he outperformed him in their head-to-head matchup. 

And to those of you who are saying, "The Falcons are the #1 seed in the NFC and the Packers are still fighting to get into the playoffs", you're missing the point.  This is an individual award, the kind that got handed out before the douchebags in this country decided to start giving every kid a trophy.  The Pro Bowl isn't about the team.  Its about the individual.  And Aaron Rodgers was better this year, as evidenced by every statistical category.  If Rodgers hadn't lost 2 of his biggest weapons (Jermichael Finley and Ryan Grant) at the start of the season, the statistical divide would be even greater.  In fact, so would the team divide.  The Packers would be the #1 seed in the NFC, and the Falcons would be coming to visit them.


Issue #3

Why are we still actually having a football game for the Pro Bowl?  Isn't it enough just to name the players to the team and let them have their honors?  Why is the NFL wasting the money to host a football game that generates no revenue from television and needlessly puts the players in harm's way?  I've got an idea for next year:

Pick the right players.  Don't play the game.